In This Issue
The Louisiana SPCA has issued a warrant for the dog owned by the legally embattled Jefferson political dynasty. The dog – named Benjamin, as in Franklin, whose picture is on the $100 bill – is accused in a federal indictment of raiding the free food and water put out by Animal Rescue of New Orleans volunteers that is intended for known strays abandoned after Katrina.
Mayor Ray Nagin's Office of Homeland Security and Public Safety has issued a one-page-fits-all “Plan Model Timeline” for city-assisted evacuation. Like any plan, model or timeline emanating from the office of the mayor, only time will tell how badly it works.
Forget the New York Times' crossword. Like our recorver, The Levee's little brain tease is actually a challenge.
Editor’s note: If you’re not reading C.B. Forgotston on his Web site or through his free e-mail subscriptions, then you simply don’t know what’s going on in New Orleans or Louisiana. Simply put, if not for C.B.’s contribution to exposing the truthfulness of state leaders’ greed in regards to obscene legislative pay raises, it’s likely the governor and the Legislature would have gotten away with it. THE LEVEE
Mandeville Mayor Eddie Price’s political fight over several widely publicized gaffes now includes a lawsuit filed by heirs of the late comedian Rodney Dangerfield. The suit alleges that Price is misappropriating the late comedian’s likeness and abusing Dangerfield’s famous line, “I don’t get no respect.”
In 1910, a 23-year-old minor-league baseball player traveled to the corner of Tulane and Carrollton avenues to meet with New Orleans Pelicans manager Charlie Frank after being traded to the Cleveland Indians organization from the Philadelphia Athletics. His name was Joe Jackson, but everyone knew him as “Shoeless.”
“It is now clear that several members of the Legislature are developmentally disabled and need an environment in which they can receive individualized attention and instruction,” said social worker Allison Byars said. “Many of our elected officials barely make sense, much less laws.”
Responding to concerns that his youth could harm his vice-presidential aspirations, Gov. Jindal announced yesterday that he will drop the name “Bobby” – a moniker he usurped from the youngest sibling on “The Brady Bunch” – and demonstrate his maturity by now taking the first name of eldest Brady sibling “Greg.”
Top Stories
A weary, haggard and uncoiffed Louisiana Gov. Bobby JIndal was dragged out of the governors mansion last night by commandos for the international ethics crimes tribunal in The Hague to face trial for the systematic genocide of the very ethics reforms that were the cornerstone of his election just six months ago.
Politically emasculated Louisiana Sen. David Vitter has teamed up with men's room legend and fellow sex-scandal Sen. Larry Craig to introduce the "Marriage Protection Amendment" to the U.S. Constitution. After announcing their bill, Vitter remained on the podium and for three hours harangued on how to properly grip a prostitute's breast (above).
MILAN – Horrified by what he termed a “fashion crime wave,” New Orleans Police Chief Warren Riley this week deployed every available officer to man an elite fashion police unit designed to combat “fringe” fashion elements within the department. Riley’s fashion push comes on the heels of the department’s controversial reprimand of 35-year police veteran Sgt. Bobby Guidry (inset photo), for wearing a blue shirt instead of black on his final day on the force.
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The New Orleans Levee newspaper is a free, satirical publication created in New Orleans and distributed monthly in and around the city and available online for everyone we wish were still home.
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From the Breach
A Kenner man reports getting the crabs at Deanies Seafood in Bucktown. Dantrell Vaughn, 37, says that he went to the popular Metairie restaurant expecting a hearty meal, but was surprised to leave with such a huge case of crabs. "I've had crabs once or twice but nothing compares to the case I got at Deanies," Vaughn said, adding.
Levee Audio
By Stephen Lerner and John Lomas
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